When you think of Hawaii, you think of long, lazy days on the beach, luaus, and some of the most beautiful water in the world. Even a boat tour is something you sometimes do. Sit right there, and you’ll hear a tale. A tale of a fateful trip that started from a tropic port aboard this tiny ship. Prepare yourselves for a three hour tour, yes, a three hour tour, as we board the SS Minnow and sail through Dangerous Tides.
[INTRO VIDEO]
{In radio weather voice} Plenty of sunshine and clear skies are expected through the Hawaiian Islands today…
The SS Minnow was 39 feet long, and was a small steam-powered craft owned by Captain Jonas “Skipper” Grumby. He was a good-natured and honest-hearted captain. He was also quick to take charge, thanks to his time in the United States Navy. Captain Grumby’s first mate, William Gilligan was known to be accident-prone, and while Grumby would get gruff with Gilligan every once in a while, he would never lose his temper with his “little buddy.” Not much is known about Grumby’s time in the Navy. He seems to have started out in the kitchen of an aircraft carrier where he worked as a cook, later getting transferred to a battleship where he served as its bandmaster. He later undertook officer's training and served alongside the 177th Infantry during World War Two, having three ships shot out from under him and converting a radio into a transmitter while trapped by enemy fire at Guadalcanal. He was also an accomplished poker player with the other officers in the Seventh Fleet, before leaving the Navy as a decorated captain and starting his excursion tour business in Honolulu. Due to his tour of duty in the South Pacific, the Skipper has met and encountered several Oceanic tribes, becoming very familiar with their myths and legends about gods, totems and mystical gems which he takes very seriously.
The other passengers on the manifesto that day were: Thurston Howell III, his wife Lovey Howell, Ginger Grant, Professor Roy Hinkley, and Mary Ann Summers. Before the Great Depression, Mr. Howell was allegedly a billionaire, according to his wife and a subsequent radio brodcast, who only became a millionaire after. Among his assets were a diamond mine, a coconut plantation, a railroad, an oil well, and 40 acres (16 ha) in Colorado – which included all of downtown Denver – that he bequeathed to his fellow castaways in his will. He also owned the Hatchet-Cuckoo Oil Company in Dust Bowl, Oklahoma.
Professor Roy Hinkley was a high school science teacher from Cleveland, Ohio. His principal expertise was as a botanist, whose purpose in joining the ill-fated voyage that stranded the castaways was to write a book to be titled Fun With Ferns. Aside from his proficiency in science, he was also adept and well-versed in law, literature, social sciences, and the arts. Besides a list of degrees from various schools (including a B.A. from USC, a B.S. from UCLA, an M.A. from SMU, and a PhD from TCU.)
Born in New York City on September 1, 1937, Grant is a "movie star" and would casually mention names of some of the biggest movie stars of the day as her co-stars or acquaintances to the Castaways, suggesting that she too was a great star. Mary Ann is in her late teens to early twenties. She was traveling alone on the "three-hour tour", which she had won in a contest. She tells the others that she has a boyfriend named Horace Higgenbotham from Horner's Corners, Kansas, so they would think she has someone special waiting for her, but confesses later that he is "a real creep" and not her boyfriend at all.
The Minnow was to provide a three-hour tour, and only packed lunches. During one of the tours, a huge storm swept the Minnow, and its passengers out to sea. Apparently, the radio announcer had accidentally broadcast the weather report from the previous day, not allowing the Skipper enough warning of its approach. The ship's wheel/rudder control was broken during the storm. After the storm abated, they drifted for a few days and hit an underwater reef near the island before eventually getting beached.
Shortly after the wreck, the Professor tried to make nails to patch up the holes in the Minnow but failed. His first attempt shattered like glass while the second exploded. Gilligan and Mary Ann eventually found tree sap to substitute for syrup while making breakfast. The sap turned out to develop into a hardy glue when it was heated. During the attempted patch-ups, Gilligan and the skipper accidentally stuck themselves to the boat and had to be rescued by the professor, who used perfume from Mrs. Howell and Ginger as a quick solvent. Despite this mishap, the repairs went along smoothly.
The next day, the Skipper had patched up the entire hull of the Minnow with the newly discovered glue. However, after remembering the mishap with repairs, the Skipper sent Gilligan to search for icebergs ahead of time. Unsuccessful in finding said icebergs, Gilligan had found out that the glue was unstable. The glue had dried into a powder and lost its adhesive properties, which would cause the Minnow to completely fall apart. Rushing back to the Skipper to warn everyone, he saw Mr. Howell attempting to relaunch the Minnow with a small ceremony. When Gilligan tried to warn him about the glue, it only took one proud tap from the Skipper to cause the boards to pop off and ricochet everywhere.
Gilligan climbed back on board to stop it, but the hull completely collapsed, resulting in nothing but the skeleton of the boat and the steering column, much to the disappointment of the passengers. That night, the Skipper commented on the good fortune that Gilligan had arrived in time, for had they set sail, they would have been out on the ocean by the time the hull collapsed.
Fifteen years after the original shipwreck of the S. S. Minnow, the seven castaways are still stranded on the island. Meanwhile, in a Soviet Union-type country, military scientists destroy an orbiting satellite that has a disc containing top-secret information to prevent the satellite from crashing to Earth. The metal disc survives and lands on the island.
The Professor realizes the disc has a unique alloy that can be used to make a new barometer. Using the barometer, the Professor deduces that a huge storm is coming and the tsunami it produces could destroy the island. To survive the deadly wave and potentially effect a rescue, the castaways build a raft by tying their huts together.
The next morning, the castaways awaken and realize they were swept off the island on the makeshift raft. When Gilligan accidentally sets the raft on fire, the United States Coast Guard spots the smoke and rescues them. Once back in modern society, the castaways are initially confused by how different everything is. After much media hype, the group reunites at Christmas aboard the S.S. Minnow II.
The insurance company finally pays for the first Minnow and the former castaways gather for a reunion cruise aboard the Minnow II. The spies make one last attempt to obtain the disc, but are thwarted by the FBI, who secure the disc from Gilligan. During the cruise, the Minnow II is caught in a storm. Gilligan unknowingly rendered the compass useless by removing its magnet when cleaning it, causing the Skipper to sail in the wrong direction. The group lands on a beach and realize they are on their old island after finding a piece of wood from the original Minnow.
I think it's time we checked the forecast one last time.
{EV}: The weather service said clear skies... just like last time...
We dedicate this podcast to those whose lives were effected by the Minnow's destruction. And as always, if you liked what you hear on this podcast, please like and subscribe. May the fair winds guide you through Dangerous Tides.
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